Self-Acceptance and Relationships

In an issue of Psychological Reports, William Schutz, an American psychologist, argues that “[l]ikeability is based on the ability to create an atmosphere within which people like themselves. I find you likeable if I like how I behave and feel in your presence. Paradoxically, my liking has little to do with you. I like you if I like myself when I am with you. People may be significant and competent but not likeable.”

In other words, we are more likely to like other individuals if we like ourselves around them. However, we are less likely to like ourselves around other individuals if we are not self-accepting. Therefore, learning to accept ourselves makes us more likely to like other individuals, and potentially improves our relationships with them.